A Few Favorite Quotes

Here, for a little uplift in the downturn, are a few of my favorite funny observations. There are lots more where these came from, and I’ll post ‘em periodically…

• “I know worrying works, because none of the stuff I worried about ever happened.” - Will Rogers
• “More people are killed every year by pigs than by sharks, which shows you how good we are at evaluating risk.” - Bruce Schneier
• “They all laughed when I said I wanted to become a professional comedian, but no one’s laughing now.” - Bob Monkhouse
• “I have known a great many troubles in my life, most of which never happened.” - Mark Twain
• “The first thing you learn in life is you’re a fool. The last thing you learn is you’re the same fool. Sometimes I think I understand everything. Then I regain consciousness.” -Ray Bradbury
• “If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin’.” - Will Rogers
• “Since everything is none other than exactly as it is, one may well just break out in laughter.” - Long Chen Pa
• “If you tell the truth you don’t have to remember anything” - Mark Twain
• “The whole problem can be stated quite simply by asking, ‘Is there a meaning to music?’ My answer would be, ‘Yes.’ And ‘Can you state in so many words what the meaning is?’ My answer to that would be, ‘No.’” -Aaron Copland
• “If only I had a little humility, I’d be perfect.” - Ted Turner
• “If there’s anything more important than my ego around, I want it caught and shot now.”
  - Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

Keep Smiling!

Greg